This blog is dedicated to my love. She is an Angel in disguise. She is my FALLEN ANGEL..

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Monday, November 19, 2012

I love you always, forever..

I love you I love you because, you’re the only one who could make me smile.I love you because, you’re the one I could talk to without being judged.I love you because, you cared for me even when the world turned against me.I love you because, you trust me and I trust youI love you because, when I made a mistake you always forgive me.I love you because, you love me.I love you because, I could open up to you about my fears.I love you because, I could talk to you of my past and not judge me for it.I love you because, you’re in my life. I will always be thankful for that.I love you because, you’re always there for me.I love how you have this catching smile that can get me smiling.I love how you always talk with your mind.I love how you laugh.I love how your voice soothed me.I love how you tease me.I love how clumsy you are.I love how I worry about you constantlyI love how you often talked to yourself I love how you pick songs for me to listen I love how I miss you so much I love how I find myself thinking of you constantly I love how you cuddle me I love how you talk to me so honestly I love how you gave me your attention I love how much I cherish you I love how I can talk to you for hours and hours every day I love how I you meant so much to me I love that I see you in everything I love that I could be in so much pain but still know I love you I love how you love orange juice I love how you had so much trust in me I love how I trust you more than myself I love that I miss you and long for you I love that I could embrace you I love how I could kiss you I love how I could hug you I love how I you baby talk I love how strong you are I love how much you care for me I love how I would wait for the next morning to hear you I love how you can dance I love how independent you are I love how you stay up all night talking to me I love how cute you are I love how I was always captivated by you I love how you really hate some people I love how you were so patient with me I love how you love babies, makes me curious to actually see your expression when holding one I love how much you love abs, I want you to fall in love with my abs. I love that you love horror movies, though they scare me some times but I can keep a straight face. I love that you’re super protective of your family and friends. I love how your hands are always cold. I always want to hold them, to warm them up for you. I love how you love music I love how you’re open minded I love how you treat others how you want to be treated I love how random you can be I love how you carefully plan things I love how you are so amazing at everything you do I love all your pieces of art that you have shown me I love how such an angel like you is in my life I love how I end up missing you and loving you so much I love how after I listen to every love song, I think of you I love how I lay in bed and imagine you sleeping beside me. I love how no matter how tired I get, you always instantly wake me up… Even if it’s in thoughts I love how calm me down just by saying it’s okay I love how you appear in my dreams I love how I think of you when it rains I love how I every time I close my eyes I see you I love how every time I sing to myself, I feel like you’re beside me I love how you believe in me no matter what. You taught me how to believe, and when you believe in someone it’s not just for a minute, or just for now. It’s forever. I love how I find more and more reasons to love you as time goes on. I love that you make me feel alive. I love that I can’t stand being without you I Love that I can't live without youI love you always, forever..

I love you……
I love you because, you’re the only one who could make me smile.
I love you because, you’re the one I could talk to without being judged.
I love you because, you cared for me even when the world turned against me.
I love you because, you trust me and I trust you
I love you because, when I made a mistake you always forgive me.
I love you because, you love me.
I love you because, I could open up to you about my fears.
I love you because, I could talk to you of my past and not judge me for it.
I love you because, you’re in my life. I will always be thankful for that.
I love you because, you’re always there for me.
I love how you have this catching smile that can get me smiling.
I love how you always talk  with your mind.
I love how you laugh.
I love how your voice soothed me.
I love how you tease me.
I love how clumsy you are.
I love how I worry about you constantly
I love how you often talked to yourself
I love how you pick songs for me to listen
I love how I miss you so much
I love how I find myself thinking of you constantly
I love how you cuddle me
I love how you talk to me so honestly
I love how you gave me your attention
I love how much I cherish you
I love how I can talk to you for hours and hours every day
I love how I you meant so much to me
I love that I see you in everything
I love that I could be in so much pain but still know I love you
I love how you love orange juice
I love how you had so much trust in me
I love how I trust you more than myself
I love that I miss you and long for you
I love that I could embrace you
I love how I could kiss you
I love how I could hug you
I love how I you baby talk
I love how strong you are
I love how much you care for me
I love how I would wait for the next morning to hear you
I love how you can dance
I love how independent you are
I love how you stay up all night talking to me
I love how cute you are
I love how I was always captivated by you
I love how you really hate some people
I love how you were so patient with me
I love how you love babies, makes me curious to actually see your expression when holding one
I love how much you love abs, I want you to fall in love with my abs.
I love that you love horror movies, though they scare me some times but I can keep a straight face.
I love that you’re super protective of your family and friends.
I love how your hands are always cold. I always want to hold them, to warm them up for you.
I love how you love music
I love how you’re open minded
I love how you treat others how you want to be treated
I love how random you can be
I love how you carefully plan things
I love how you are so amazing at everything you do
I love all your pieces of art that you have shown me
I love how such an angel like you is in my life
I love how I end up missing you and loving you so much
I love how after I listen to every love song, I think of you
I love how I lay in bed and imagine you sleeping beside me.
I love how no matter how tired I get, you always instantly wake me up… Even if it’s in thoughts
I love how calm me down just by saying it’s okay
I love how you appear in my dreams
I love how I think of you when it rains
I love how I every time I close my eyes I see you
I love how every time I sing to myself, I feel like you’re beside me
I love how you believe in me no matter what. You taught me how to believe, and when you believe in someone it’s not just for a minute, or just for now. It’s forever.
I love how I find more and more reasons to love you as time goes on.
I love that you make me feel alive.
I love that I can’t stand being without you
I Love that I can't live without you
I love you always, forever..

Friday, November 16, 2012

I’m a little bit scared of what comes after..


Well, Jesus Christ I’m not scared to die. I’m a little bit scared of what comes after

Well, Jesus Christ
I’m not scared to die.
I’m a little bit scared of
what comes after..

I’m Sorry.


I’m Sorry.

I’m Sorry.

You cannot possibly Imagine exactly how much I hate myself


You cannot possibly Imagine exactly how much I hate myself

You cannot possibly Imagine
exactly how much I hate myself

I’m used to it.


You will forget about me. But it’s okay, I’m used to it.

You will forget
about me.

But it’s okay,
I’m used to it.

Welcome to my ruined life.


Bad decisions? That’s fine. Welcome to my ruined life.

Bad decisions?
That’s fine.
Welcome to my ruined life.

I’m trying to think of a reason to keep on living.


I’m trying to think of a reason to keep on living.

I’m trying to think of a reason
to keep on living.

I bet they’re saying all kind of things about me.


I bet they’re saying all kind of things about me.

I bet they’re saying
all kind of things about me.

I am simply useless and wandering


I sometimes think that I don’t have purpose in this world. I am simply useless and wandering

I sometimes think that
I don’t have purpose in this world.
I am simply useless and wandering

I think Terrible things


I think Terrible things

I think Terrible things

I’m miserable


I’m miserable

I’m miserable

There are no secrets in life, just hidden truths that lie beneath the surface.


There are no secrets in life, just hidden truths that lie beneath the surface.

There are no secrets in life,
just hidden truths
that lie beneath
the surface.

Something inside me died.


When you walked out the door, something inside me died.
When you walked out the door,
something inside me died. 

But I’m going to cry.


I was trying my best not to, but I’m going to cry.

I was trying my best not to,
but I’m going to cry.

I’ve completely lost my self

I’ve completely lost my self

I’ve completely lost my self

Why do these tears come every time I think of you?

Why do these tears come every time I think of you?

Why do these tears come every time I think of you?

When I smile, nobody ask me questions


When I smile, nobody ask me questions

When I smile, 
nobody ask me questions

Can I just fall asleep and never wake up?


Can I just fall asleep and never wake up?

Can I just fall asleep and never wake up?

I can’t do anything to escape from them..


It gets harder at night, when everyone leaves me with alone with my loneliness, and I can’t do anything to escape from them..

It gets harder at night,
when everyone leaves me
with alone with my loneliness,
and I can’t do anything to escape from them..

You pretend it doesn’t bother you, but you just want to explode


You pretend it doesn’t bother you, but you just want to explode


You pretend it doesn’t bother you,
but you just want to explode

Oh..

Oh..

Oh..

How do you talk to people..?


How do you talk to people..? I can’t. It scares me. I feel like they’re judging me.

How do you talk to people..?
I can’t.
It scares me.
I feel like they’re judging me.

The worst time of my life

I thought I already have been through the worst time of my life, it turns out that was just a warm up.

I thought I already have been
through the worst time of my life,
it turns out that was just a warm up.

I don’t like feeling things.


I don’t like remembering. Remembering makes me feel things. I don’t like feeling things.

I don’t like remembering.
Remembering makes me feel things.
I don’t like feeling things.

That’s how depression hits.


That’s how depression hits. You wake up one morning, afraid that you’re gonna live.

That’s how depression hits.
You wake up one morning,
afraid that you’re gonna live.   

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Deep inside you want to cry..

I can see you are sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh, I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you want to cry..


I can see you are sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh, I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you want to cry.. 

I am tired of thinking

I am just another nothing


I am just another nothing

I am tired of thinking

I am tired of thinking


I am tired of thinking

I am beginning to let myself down.

I am beginning to let myself down.


I am beginning to let myself down.

I am still depressed because I am alone & no one loves me

I am still depressed because I am alone & no one loves me


I am still depressed because I am alone & no one loves me 

I'm not quite like myself these days. I'm bit abnormal.

I'm not quite like myself these days. I'm bit abnormal.


I'm not quite like myself these days. I'm bit abnormal.

The days feel like years when I'm alone

The days feel like years when I'm alone


The days feel like years when I'm alone

Everything is so hard afterwards

Everything is so hard afterwards

Everything is so hard afterwards

Everybody has a secret world inside them..

Everybody has a secret world inside them..


Everybody has a secret world inside them..

Thinking how much we loved each other once..

Thinking how much we loved each other once..


Thinking how much we loved each other once..

I started a never ending fight with myself..

In this whole world you are the only person I love, the only one person I love terribly & desperately. I'm addicted to your love, even if its a hardcore reality  but I don't want to believe it, I can live without you & I know I started a never ending fight with myself..















In this whole world you are the only person I love, the only one person I love terribly & desperately. I'm addicted to your love, even if its a hardcore reality  but I don't want to believe it, I can live without you & I know I started a never ending fight with myself..  

Sometimes I miss people even before they leave me alone
















Sometimes I miss people even before they leave me alone
&
I get depressed 

Heart make decisions without thinking about consequences.

Heart make decisions without thinking about consequences. Because it doesn't have mind to think It can never see the lonely days that follow.














Heart make decisions without thinking about consequences.
Because it doesn't have mind to think
It can never see the lonely days that follow.

I am falling in love with death

I am falling in love with death






I am falling in love with death

Did I ever existed.

I walk around everyday like a ghost, many times I question myself whether I exist in this world & many times I think did I ever existed.














I walk around everyday
like a ghost, many times
I question myself
whether I exist in this world
&
many times
 I think did I ever existed.